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Letters to our Daughters: Why don't I look like her?

Dear Daughters,

I pray this correspondence finds you healthy and strong!

There seems to be a need for me to share with you some challenges that I’ve had to overcome to get to this point in my life. As you read, please know that I write this with love and pray that you will learn a great deal from such a small passage.

My background is as diverse as can be! From working in the tobacco fields of North Carolina to working in the fields of Corporate America, my experiences are as vast as the world we live in. I grew up in a small town where everyone knew each other, my curfew was when the street lights came on, and my neighbors had permission to discipline me while my parents were away and another guaranteed whipping once my parents returned home! It was simpler time…but a time when everyone was invested in my outcome!

Growing up, it was an absolute that I would do well in school. I didn’t get paid for good grades, that was the expectation. Those good grades did not come without consequences from my peers. You see, I was bussed throughout school to “majority” schools…for a minority to do well and thrive in that environment was not taken well by my “minority” classmates. Not only was I teased and called names like “nerd,” the kids also teased me about my appearance. I was chubby, wore glasses, had a gap between my 2 front teeth, AND made good grades! I was a prime candidate to be bullied, and I was!

Daughters, it was not an easy time for me. I wasted a lot of time thinking, “Why me? Why don’t I look like her? Why can’t I be as popular as her? Why can’t my family live there?” God truly dealt with me as I battled the voices in my head! I didn’t know it then, but God had started speaking to me about the person I would become. I was different and I finally accepted that as my truth. Not that being different was a bad thing…it was just my thing. The more He shared with me, the stronger my mind became. People could say whatever they wanted about me, but it only mattered if I believed it!

Daughters, what bullies think of you is none of your business! What God thinks about you is definitely your business! There will always be someone more popular, someone who looks better, someone who lives in a better neighborhood, but what I learned was, none of that mattered! None of that has a bearing on your future. Your future is something that you can design, but it starts in your mind. How you see yourself, and how you use the gifts that God has given to you…that’s what we call VISION and that’s what matters! So, never mind what the bullies are saying about you, what are YOU saying about you? Daughters, you are POWERFUL, you are SMART, you are BRAVE, you are BOLD, you are BEAUTIFUL inside and out! I believe in you! I am proud of you! I love you!

Your life is just beginning and I can’t wait to see what you have to offer the world! I encourage you to use your gifts, walk in your purpose, and bless others as often as possible! Be unapologetic about your call and your passion to fulfill it! The world is at your feet and now the ball is in your court!

Aspiring to Inspire you,


Learn more about Deanna


ABOUT Letters to our Daughters

Letters to Our Daughters is a B2F Girls! campaign that aspires to empower girls with the courage to overcome obstacles and follow their dreams as they learn from women who have overcome many challenges and have positioned themselves to live a fierce life. We hope that the stories will be healing and empowering for both the writer and the reader.

ABOUT B2F Girls!

B2F Girls! is on a mission to equip girls nationally with healthy self-esteem so that they can be the best version of themselves. When this happens, everyone benefits. B2F Girls! offers a robust certification program and training intensive, complete with resources, implementation guides and support for women who have a calling to mentor girls. We also produce national female empowerment events.


B2F Girls! initially started as an organization called Tween Style Power that offered free local workshops for girls ages 10-17 that addressed the areas of self-worth, body image and leadership. After our first successful year of implementation, we began to notice we were receiving an influx of women from various parts of the country asking how they could implement a similar program for the girls in their communities. It was then that we recognized a gap that required a systematic and accessible way of providing the training we were already offering. This made way for the launch of B2F Girls!


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